3 Pillars of my Existence

The trifecta that defines my success level of life is as follows:

1.  To be the best mom/wife I can be.

  • This includes allowing my kids to make dinner for themselves almost every night because, hey, I can’t go with them to college.
  • I also am teaching them how to do laundry by insisting I don’t.  (I wish that worked.)
  • My children all can clean bathrooms because I surely don’t plan on stepping foot inside those little tiny windowless rooms to clean them if I don’t have to (read:  unless company is coming over.)
  • I also send them to bed early some nights to read so I can watch the inappropriate TV shows I have been missing all evening.  (Ask around, I am raising myself some good readers.)
  • Bill has been trained with similar tactics just in case something ever happens to me like I disappear for the month of January and mysteriously come back with a deep tan and amnesia.

These people are independent, and I think that means I have completed my job about 5 – 7 years earlier than expected.  I will just sit back with my feet up during the teen years.  Job done.

2.  To become the ultimate Non-Amish Amish.  Now that I have been to multiple Amish auctions and studied the Amish people intently, I have a simple list of what it will take for me to be just Amish enough to be labeled the “Ultimate non-Amish Amish.”

  • First, I must cook stuff.  Look here and here.  Cook good stuff?  Check.
  • Second, I must make quilts.  Obviously, this weekend, I crossed that off my to-do list.  These quilty things I whip out with no effort will fetch huge money at the non-Amish quilt auction.
  • Thirdly, I must get good at lighting matches.  I am afraid of them.  I also do not like the dark.  Do Amish use Aim-N-Flames?  Hmmmm, something I will have to search out next time I visit the Amish.
  • The last thing I need to do to become Amish is get used to wearing dresses with stockings and old nurse shoes.  That is going to take some sort of miracle.

3.  To be a better Christian.  I know I cant earn my way to heaven (Ephesians 2:8-9) but I can do things to strengthen my faith.  These things include reading my Bible more often, serving others more, and praying more.

  • Actually, the praying thing comes pretty naturally to me since I took out all the fluff.  Gone are the thou’s and thee’s and all that gibberish, and now I often pray things like, “This situation sucks, God, give me wisdom.”  Really, He doesn’t need the details, He kinda already knows everything.  Short and sweet, just like me.
  • Serving others more – well, I signed up for the nursery.  Why?  I don’t know, I really thought I would never change diapers again after diapering four at once.  Something about other peoples’ crap that makes me hurl.  I donno what that is, oh yes I do.  It is poop, people, smeared all over, and I am responsible for getting rid of it.  YUCK!  Oh well, I am going to give it a try.  If I throw up, I will know it was not God’s plan for my Sunday mornings.
  • Reading the Bible is really a tough one for me.  I just don’t get into it.  Is that way too honest?  I have read most of it, honestly, I have.  I just have never found a way to make daily reading habit.  I don’t know if you have figured out that I am just not a disciplined girl.  But now I have a plan.  Our Pastor’s wife preached last week while he golfed in Thailand and she said she reads while doing something she does every day – for her, it was eating cereal, but since I often skip breakfast (I know, I know) that wouldn’t work for me.  Instead, I think I will read it while taking a bath.  Bubble bath with God.  And then I will leave it open on my dresser so I can grab a little Godly wisdom as I get dressed in the morning.  I am hoping this works better for me.

You may wonder why I have 3 pillars instead of 4.  I had planned on 4, but I couldn’t think of the fourth thing – and so I edited my title and opening sentence.  It is my blog and I can do whatever I want with it.

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