A Letter To My Dog

Dear Lucy,

Knock it off.  I know we just had your leg sawed in two and then pieced back together with a plate and six screws.  Dad has had both knees worked on and he didn’t whine this much.  He didn’t keep me up at night with his crying and whining.  He went to work the next day. Crutches and all.

I know you are on all kinds of meds, but I am actually jealous of that.  I could use a pain killer right now – you have no idea how bad my lower back aches today.  The anti-inflammatory meds would help with that too.  The stuff you take to prevent ulcers could make me able to drink more Coke, which due to my lack of sleep, thanks to you, would come in handy as well.   Enjoy the meds.  Sooner or later, you have to go all celebrity drug withdrawal on me and kick the habit.

Yes, you have to stay in your kennel in the garage away from the comfort of carpet, your new awesome bed, and at times when we forget to close our bedroom door, a nice queen size bed for you to lounge on.  Some labs spend every day of their lives in outdoor kennels braving the elements.  I have always said you are no Motel 6 dog, but come on, you have a bed in your kennel.  It isn’t so bad.

Sure, you walk around with one leg shaven.  That is better than me – I am expected to have two legs shaven and two armpits.  Get over it. 

The old cone on your head sucked, that I realize.  But I bought you a better one.  I hear it is all the rage in doggy rehab.  You can lay your head down now without banging into a wall of the kennel.  Try it.  SLEEP please.  I had to go to three stores to find it.  Take advantage of my love to shop, even for dog cones.

I am sorry you cant roll around in the grass, fetch a tennis ball, or jump up on the couch for family movie night.  These things will happen again if you just mellow today (and for the next oh,  six weeks) and let the bones fuse.  Really.  I am going to go insane if you cry all day.

Thanks,

The one who let you sleep on our bed on my pillow

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