Life with Triplets part 3

We are in the sweet spot as a family right now.  The kids are pretty independent and well-trained.  They can help with jobs and actually accomplish quite a bit, get themselves up and ready in the morning and tucked in at night.  Gone are the days of getting up early when they get up and counting down the hours until they are asleep for the night.  Grocery shopping is no longer considered mom time.  The house is just as cluttered, but not as dirty – food no longer lands all over my dining room (part of that credit goes to my dog.)  Bathrooms no longer have potty chairs and stepstools to deal with.  Toothbrushes are in drawers and don’t blink or sing anymore.  The kids can wash their own laundry (not that they do, but they can) and clean the bathrooms.  I can send one to the gas station if I need something.  Oh, happiness. I know the teenage years are ahead of us, I don’t know what that exactly means, but I am scared.

So what is it like right now to have triplets?  Having multiple birth children always means an extra kind of competition.  The name of the game is “who excels at what?”  Grades, test scores, behaviors, friends, activities; all of it gets reported back to mom.  I have worked very hard to bury deep into my kids the understanding that they are all different and will be good at different things, but clearly when you hear things like “You have three smart kids and one dumb kid, and I am the dumb one,”  there is a level of awareness among the three of them that I didn’t have with all my singleton siblings.  (Or maybe it was just because I was so darn good at everything that I just didn’t notice.)  I hope you don’t get the idea that they don’t get along out of this, they do – the girls especially.  I think it boils down to the difference of a singleton vs. a multiple competing against his/her peers – in our case that means against your own siblings.

On the mom side of things, having multiples go through stages of life means being forced to be able to cope with major changes all at once.  I didn’t get to put one on the kindergarten bus and walk home with the little brothers and sisters for another day of life as I know it minus one.  I came home empty handed.  My house went from chaos to deathly silent in a matter of 5 minutes.  When I send them to middle school next fall, it will be a BIG deal.  I will go from 1 there to 4.  No easing in and out of life around here – jump and hope you land upright.  Transitions are very hard emotionally on me because they are realizations the complete stages of our family life are over just like that.  When they graduate from high school and all leave me, I already have a support team lined up to scrape me off the driveway and take me on a vacation to somewhere awesome.

This is my analogy:  Most families trees with four children see their kid branches whittled away slowly, but with multiples, someone takes a chain saw and just hacks the branch down.  Done.  Over.  Complete.  Moving on.

20091219_174522_2974  Whoa – all this long shaggy hair on the boys – yikes!

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Nicolle D
    Oct 04, 2010 @ 17:45:26

    You and Bill need to join our Life Group on Wed nights! We are reading the book “Preparing for Today’s Adolescent” by the Raineys (of family life today). It is a great book, and our group is really fun already, but if you guys joined…it would be off the hook!

    Reply

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